The Mod

The Mortgage Lender’s Scam

When I was young I often dreamt

Of owning a home one day
A great investment it would be

No money down, thirty years to pay

So my wife and I bought a house

And together we made it a home

A wonderful place to raise our kids

With lots of land for them to roam.

For years we lived there happily

In love, watching our children grow

Then one day my health went south

Couldn’t work, had to take life slow

My wife was forced to get a job

She worked hard but the pay was low

Unemployment? It wasn’t enough

To make ends meet, our debts did grow

Missed some payments, what will our lender do?

No worry, we understand, we can bend,

They say, we really want to help you

If you modify we’ll tack it to the end

Okay, sounds good, what do we do now?

Fill out this form, Send us this and that

No payments due until you’re approved

We’ll get this mod done in nothing flat

We do all they ask, they say, just relax,

Then a letter comes—your payment’s late!

We wilt in disbelief. You said don’t pay

But now it’s ‘pay up’ or we’ll accelerate?

We call them, distraught, confused, upset

We don’t understand this chilling event?

After passing us around, a supervisor says

Ignore the letter, it shouldn’t have been sent.

But weeks go by, yet not approved,

More letters come that make us squirm,

We call, complain, get passed around.

Don’t worry. All is well, they confirm

Weeks stretch to months, still no word

Then a letter arrives by certified mail

I call, upset. Oh, don’t be concerned

But, what in the hell is a trustee’s sale?

They say it’s all a computer glitch

Just hang in there, your mod’s a go

But from a law firm? I’m not convinced

They say, they know, just breath slow

I call again to check what’s going on

Can’t find my application anywhere?

I sigh in disbelief, such incompetence,

Beyond belief, I’ll kill them all, I swear.

Now the constable’s knocking at my door.

You said you ‘d wait, you wouldn’t dare,

Sell my house at a foreclosure sale? I call,

Mad as hell, but noone there seems to care

It’s too late now. Tried to help you out,

We did our best. Sorry, what can we say?

But don’t despair,'Cash for Keys' is still a go

Move out now, no fuss, and have a nice day!